Ran across this article about gun violence illustrations on Drawger (really want to write "Drawager," like it's an old widow living in an Abbey who draws), and it reminded me of something.

As part of a story in Entertainment Weekly on gun violence in Hollywood, post the Newtown shooting, EW commissioned a number of illustrations. Soon after the shootings, which took place in the town where my parents live (they moved while I was in college, so I've never felt as if I 'lived' there), I tried to do a personal illustration. I'd intended to do a beautiful painting - highlighting the details, creating the patterns - of the rifle, the legal mass-killing machine used to take children away from innocence. And their parents.

I couldn't do it. I did my research, I started sketching, and I couldn't do it.

It's such a joy to paint something beautiful. For me, as the painter, I enjoy the journey, and the destination - the finished image - is an additional benefit. But to paint, to find the beauty in something that only exists to kill - and to kill mass amounts, violently and finally - well, no.

After nearly 20 years in the design world, as an Account person no less, saying "no" to a client (albeit the client was me...) was tough. But